« Prague | Home | Prato conference update »

Why I love Vikings

I LOVE VIKINGS.

Like, there’s no other way to say it. Vikings are so freaking badass it makes me want to gut people with grossly oversized swords. I feel like the kid from Real Ultimate Power, but I’m actually serious. I fucking love Vikings with all of my being, and then even more. (I was gonna say that I love them more than I love breathing, but when you’re a Viking, you can’t always love breathing. So maybe I could have said that I loved them more than I love the prospect of drinking with Oden in Valhalla, but that’d be a lie.)

Seeing Amon Amarth live the other night (pics here) definitely made me consider running away to become a Viking. I would have a plundering ship and name it Flessskinnjoldrmangandrokthurkapjlodrojr. I’d have some Viking jawn pieces I’d roll around with and we’d point at people and call them Normans and then burn down their cities, wherever they may be.

What I don’t understand is why anyone ever opposed the Vikings. If anything that badass attacked me, I would take that as an obvious sign of my having failed at life, and I’d just flex my whole body and scream while waiting to be decapitated.

Now, just showing Amon Amarth lyrics without also showing the swords and tall dudes with long hair and insane drums and furious vocals is a bit half-assed, I realize. But bear with me, and check these out.

From “Cry Of The Black Birds”:

Charge your horses across the fields,
Together we ride into destiny!
Have no fear of death, when it’s your time:
Oden will bring us home when we die!

From “Runes To My Memory”:

When I am dead, lay me in a mound
Raise a stone for all to see: Runes carved to my memory!

From the timeless “Death In Fire”:

The wait is soon at end. Always charge, never bend!
Morning is here, make your stand
Live for honor, glory, DEATH IN FIRE!

Total war is here, face it without fear
Age of sword, age of spear
Fight for honor, glory, DEATH IN FIRE!

See the fire rise, flames are raging high
Soon all will burn and die
Burn for honor, glory, DEATH IN FIRE!

Storm of lethal flames, only death remains
Ragnarok is closing in
Die for honor, glory, DEATH IN FIRE!

The bridge from “The Pursuit Of Vikings” (see video below):

Oden! Guide our ships
Our axes, spears and swords
Guide us through storms that whip
And in brutal war!

From “Down The Slopes Of Death”:

Down the slopes of death he rides
The eight hooves pound like drums
Darkness reigns the crumbling sky:
Invasion has begun

From “Across The Rainbow Bridge”:

I dress myself in battle clothes
Alone I make the final ride
My sight is blurred by whipping snow
I seek to end my life.

I want to walk across the Rainbow Bridge,
And see my fathers in the golden hall!
They beckon me to join their feast
In my dreams I hear their call…

Hell, just read all their lyrics: Versus The World, Fate Of Norns, With Oden On Our Side.

At the show last night, I was fortunate enough to catch the first minute of “Death In Fire” on video. It’s pretty intense, because the crowd erupted in battle moshing when they announced the song, and so it took me a while to extract my camera from the depths of flesh below shoulder height. But that worked out well, because the camera bursts forth from the crowd right as the intro guitar riff comes in, like a a sword ripping out through a Norman’s back.

Check out the Death In Fire video. If this doesn’t make you bang your head, you need to see a doctor.

And not as grand, as this was the closing song, and everyone was exhausted, here’s the bridge from The Pursuit Of Vikings.

UNDERSTAND YE YET, OR WHAT?