Tonight I saw a movie. I mean, I think you could call it that. In retrospect, I would rather have been waterboarded. Here’s a taste of how little sense this movie made.
In case you’re still kind of sane after watching that, try the next one. It’s brilliant in that the uploader spun the movie to look like the comedy it was, instead of some grade-F horror flick.
I don’t know that I can sleep after this, but I’m going to try.
One closing thought: Are we as a society honestly still so threatened by paganism (and its ties to notions of feminine power, however oblique or tenuous) that we need to demonize it in our art?
This just occurred to me now…but bees don’t work like that. You can’t “pour” bees down a funnel. They’re not motor oil or some shit, they’re goddamn bees. They fly. They DEFY GRAVITY. IT’S WHAT THEY DO.
HOW’D IT GET BURNED HOW’D IT GET BURNED
LOLING NICK CAGE IN A BEAR SUIT WITH A BITCH SLAP
Bees most certainly do not work like that.
Someone complained that I didn’t use the title of the movie in this post. You guys are pretty with me on that decision to try to erase it from history, right?
But, on a more serious note, watching movie likes ‘The Wicker Man’ is something I do semi-professionally these days so if you are ever looking for recommendations go ahead and ask.
I prefer to have the internet digest them for me and regurgitate them in the form of YouTube videos much more palatable than the messy originals.
One notable exception would definitely be Silent Night Deadly Night 2, which I still plan to see in the glory of its entirety.
Thank god.
I just watched this over the weekend. Well, most of it anyway. In addition to being a terrible movie, the demonizing of women was absolutely inexcusable.
Not even remotely a worthy successor of the original.
Aye! It’s probably obvious, but a lot of this videos were tagged on YouTube with “Nicholas Cage hates women.”
I’m still hearing lots of positive stuff about the original. (I’m also hearing lots of stupid questions.) Apparently Christopher Lee was “Lord Summersisle” in the first one? WTF? Why change that element?
Misogyny is so 20th century.